nobody cares when you're young

Did you know that babies have soft skulls so they come out of you without being crushed?

It’s summer and mangoes are in season and you have as much hours in the day as there are freckles on your face.

But you’re also learning a harsh lesson: the worst time to be in crisis is when the person you usually lean on is also in crisis.

Because even though the mangoes have all turned and blackened with worms…

And even though the rain isn’t rain but sharp tiny axes that splits your spine like normal-sized axes split logs – you can’t complain.

You can’t cry into the phone. And her voice doesn’t reach out over continents like a hand to hold you.

She has much bigger problems than you do. Everyone has much bigger problems than you do. And they wish they had all this time you waste.

The days come like a wild wind that flips you on your back like a turtle.

But, you’re not being crushed. not even close. Learn to rock from side to side. Sit tight, child. Wait for high tide.

…..

I know love feels like a ship on the horizon that’s always coming but never comes. And I know you’d pay to be able to look at yourself with a steady acceptance. With the loving shrug you give to a dog that tears into the couch but everyone’s already bonded with so you can’t send back to the pond. I know it might be tempting to abandon yourself, curl into a ball and sink your teeth into where your knees meet your thighs in despair.

But one day, you’ll learn to roll out of bed regardless of the endless pound in your head and you’ll take a pottery class and meet a girl with fingers of warm clay and she’ll mold a heart out of the splatter in your chest. And when you call, she listens and she understands that just because you’re young doesn’t mean you’re indestructible or spoiled.

And you’ll find joy and if not joy, then contentment for the life you’ve chosen. And you’ll study yourself and know yourself and yours would be the skin you’d choose if you ever could.

The world then opens up like a flower. You’re a raindrop falling over a petal and over a turtle’s deep green shell and you’re not alone because every molecule of oxygen you breathe in has a name you know by heart. And falling doesn’t mean drowning and drowning doesn’t mean drowning either.

And the girl from pottery class goes away and others come and they go but you’ve finally learnt to stop waiting for the ship.

And you finally called that one person who had much bigger problems than you did. And even though you haven’t spoken in years, you finally see what was eating her alive while you watched. She couldn’t be the straw you grasped at. And you couldn’t be the same. So, you forgive her, and you hope that she can do the same.

P.S closed mouths don’t get fed so I just needed to say this, just in case…

I’ve always been fascinated by ethical marketing and branding and I finally took a copywriting course!

(I have a portfolio and a certificate and everything)

So if you (or your loved one) have a business and you need a writer to help get your message across and appeal to your ideal audience, then I’m your girl. send me a dm if you’re interested, muah.