I remember a few years ago I started asking myself "But WHY am I trying so hard to be a "good" person?" It sounds terrible to say but it's so important to ask yourself, what does it really mean to be a good person? And why do you strive to be "good?" Is it because you care? Or because it's what you were taught?
This this this! When I decided I was tired of living angry and leaving myself behind I asked myself this question too. I thought I’d never get out of this “people pleasing” habit that was taught to me: in order to feel loved, I comply. But wow! When I asked myself that question there was no real answer that served ME.
Omg I WAS the insect😳 but I’m so much happier now, more myself. I’ve started to learn to say “no” when I don’t want to do something or don’t have the energy to. I’ve started to center myself, and that makes it easier to manage the weight. And I show up more authentically in my relationships because I find I actually WANT to be there, present. 😕🥺This was a really captivating read, and I’m in awe of your ability to put into words this feeling I hadn’t know how to explain!!! Thanks for sharing!
Beautiful piece. It was almost draining having to compromise all the time, to be an extremely angry - thought daughter, but time has dawned on me that it really is okay to be a bad person, embrace my views of the world and cut off anyone I have to compromise my morals for.
Your writing skills are phenomenal!! Your ability to invoke strong emotions with your words is just chefs kiss. I love how you don’t shy away from expressing haunting and raw elements in your descriptions
“It’s okay to leave you stricken with horror, gasping at the absurdity that I have chosen to make of my life.” - I love this because yes!
Gregor Samsa has been my Roman Empire ever since I finished the book. After all he gave, all he sacrificed—after being so good, never missing a day of work—he was still treated like a lazy piece of trash the moment he was late just once, the moment he could no longer provide for his family as he once did. And to think his father had secretly saved enough money to support them comfortably, even if Gregor had stopped working—it infuriates me.
I remember a few years ago I started asking myself "But WHY am I trying so hard to be a "good" person?" It sounds terrible to say but it's so important to ask yourself, what does it really mean to be a good person? And why do you strive to be "good?" Is it because you care? Or because it's what you were taught?
This this this! When I decided I was tired of living angry and leaving myself behind I asked myself this question too. I thought I’d never get out of this “people pleasing” habit that was taught to me: in order to feel loved, I comply. But wow! When I asked myself that question there was no real answer that served ME.
Omg I WAS the insect😳 but I’m so much happier now, more myself. I’ve started to learn to say “no” when I don’t want to do something or don’t have the energy to. I’ve started to center myself, and that makes it easier to manage the weight. And I show up more authentically in my relationships because I find I actually WANT to be there, present. 😕🥺This was a really captivating read, and I’m in awe of your ability to put into words this feeling I hadn’t know how to explain!!! Thanks for sharing!
Hi A’Daja, I’m so so glad you resonate with this so deeply. thank you for reading!
Oh my goddess. This is a masterpiece. "I don’t hate anymore because I am no longer forced to like..." Thank you, Beautiful not-good one.
so good that English falls short, kazi safi! ( direct translation: clean work but what I mean is deeper, no wrongs, no misses, pure perfection).
oh my god, I’m getting this framed 🫀
thank you for (always) reading Esther! I’m so glad it resonated!
This is PHENOMENAL your writing is so beautiful!!!
always a pleasure Maya🫀
The sentence about people pleasing, how you hate yourself and also everyone else around you. Hit hard😭
Beautiful piece. It was almost draining having to compromise all the time, to be an extremely angry - thought daughter, but time has dawned on me that it really is okay to be a bad person, embrace my views of the world and cut off anyone I have to compromise my morals for.
exactly !
Your writing skills are phenomenal!! Your ability to invoke strong emotions with your words is just chefs kiss. I love how you don’t shy away from expressing haunting and raw elements in your descriptions
“It’s okay to leave you stricken with horror, gasping at the absurdity that I have chosen to make of my life.” - I love this because yes!
Kaothar I had to come back and read this one again, shit cut right through me
and boy am I glad for that🫀 thank you
I just sat up straight and felt my heart beat a little faster. This awoke something in me. A brilliant piece of writing.
Thank you for sharing this with us. I loved the framing. You may enjoy the book Karma by Sadhguru.
This was IMMACULATE
Gregor Samsa has been my Roman Empire ever since I finished the book. After all he gave, all he sacrificed—after being so good, never missing a day of work—he was still treated like a lazy piece of trash the moment he was late just once, the moment he could no longer provide for his family as he once did. And to think his father had secretly saved enough money to support them comfortably, even if Gregor had stopped working—it infuriates me.
obsessed!!
i’m so excited to read this bc the cover photo makes me so viscerally uncomfy 😭